Let’s talk about sex, woo its about to get hot in here because I am going in UNCENSORED. If you missed it, that was a disclaimer. Sex is part of human nature that has been stigmatized by a lot of factors, such as the threat of diseases/violence, religion, misogyny, unwanted pregnancies, and societal strain. A big chunk of the society is conditioned by monogamy, abstinence, and anti-fornication discussions to critically manage the overwhelming negative effects of sex. We are in a world that castigates the expressions of delight towards carnal knowledge. The rampant statistics of human sex trafficking and rape has created an egg-shell walking attitude around the thrills that are implicated with sex.
Talking about the pleasures of the actual act itself is an evil admonished by the moral police. This blog is part of a sexual revolution that dismantles the taboo of indulging in dialogues about the gratifications of sex. It is essential that we have open conversations on how we can derive ultimate enjoyment from this act. It takes two consenting adults to be part of this dialogue. I have been in a lot of social media groups for women and a greater number of them are not satisfied with sex because everybody is chasing the nut. Its a race to the finishing line and usually men get there first but when a man ejaculates we know that round is over. (until further notice, which is the pits if you are highly stimulated and you have to inconveniently wait or worse. Sleep.) We need to slow down, sexually discover ourselves and learn how to gift each other with beautiful brain-numbing orgasms.
I thought about Scrat the saber-toothed squirrel from The Ice Age Sequel and his plot is quite fascinating. It is as oscillate like a pendulum, a nail-biting but hilarious story with crazy cataclysmal events. Scrat spends the 96 minutes in each Ice Age movie chasing a nut without realizing that in his pursuit for the nut, he kindles apocalyptic incidents such as separating the continents and creating the solar system. I mean this little squirrel met the love of his life Scratte and lost it all to chasing the nut. So dialing back to, how does this relate to sex? Right, sex for a lot of people is about climaxing and not taking time in savoring the act before climax. Scrat literally changed the world but did not realize it because he was focused on getting that acorn. Are you taking time to sexually connect with your partner and enjoy coitus before climaxing? Or the ultimate goal is to cum? Sex is meant to be enjoyable and any man who cums before his woman is a selfish lover. This is what grates my tits, a Scrat. Racing to bust a nut without making the experience memorable. An orgasm is a bonus but every stroke should be a toe curler. Honestly, life is too short for wack sex.
I could give a 101 article on how to have great sex but people are wired differently and have divergent fetishes. Whatever criteria used to pair up as sexual mates, people have to be considerate of their partner’s needs and have communication skills that aids both of their sexual pleasure. It is important that there is a build-up and a lot of foreplay. The crux of this blog is to plead with unknown internet strangers to not waste precious life moments with hurried aggravated sex that results in discontentment and a sense of self- worthlessness. Lying in bed, staring at the ceiling wondering, ‘What just happened?’ is an absurdity that should be avoided by all means. Get into that BDSM mantra that you both like, unfold the folds with your tongue and choke on it if you like, fundamentally enjoy each other before climax. Patriarchy made sex one-sided, for a while I believed that men enjoyed it more than us. Hell did I take a step back upon discovering that we experience stronger and longer orgasms, I mean we can have multiple orgasms over and over again. We can not be robbed of such a delicious experience. Getting to know each other physically and mentally can achieve an asynchronous mind-blowing sexual experience. All I am saying is don’t be a Scrat.
Use protection, get screened for STIs, HIV, visit the New Start Counselling and Testing Centre and the Family Planning Clinic to prevent unwanted pregnancies. Learn more about the consequences of sex from Respect Not Fear. Most importantly, make sure whatever sexual activities you indulge in, there is solid consent from participants. Sex without consent is rape, sex with an underage is rape, getting someone drunk so you can take advantage of them is rape, insisting on having sex repeatedly until someone gives in reluctantly is rape, if your partner changes her mind during sex, if she says stop, please stop. Refusal to stop is rape. Sex is such a beautiful act, enjoy it and don’t abuse it. Stay safe and keep it hunnid.